Hi, I am Paxxxxx Shrivastava,female,22 years, law graduate. I need help for overcoming my troubled relationship. I met this guy, last year in my college. He is a year junior to me. We had religious differences as he is a Muslim and I am a Hindu, but that didn't deter us from falling in love with each other. I already was in a relationship when I met him but broke up with my ex just to be with this person. Initially everything was perfect, but then one fine day my ex started calling me and blackmailed me.
I had told Saif (present boyfriend) everything about my past in the beginning itself. After that problems started. Earlier he used to verbally abuse me but with time he started to abuse me physically. Every time I revolted he used to put the blame on me. He made me cut all my contacts. This continued for a year until I graduated. My parents knew about it but I stopped them from taking any action. When I came back he still didn't trust me and fought with me. And one fine day I stopped talking to him and changed my number. For a month he begged me via mails that he would change but my mother made me promise that I won't talk to him no matter what so I didn't. I still cry for him and feel like talking to him. What do I do? Please help me get over it. It’s been a month we spoke. Please help, I feel miserable.
Expert Advice –
I understand your problem. We all get into relationships and fall in love and get attached to people. Sometimes even when we know someone is wrong for us or we are in a relationship that is unhealthy for us, we still find it difficult to leave.
In your case, I can see that you are a smart and an intelligent girl. You know that this relationship is unhealthy for you. I understand it is difficult to move on. We all have moments where we miss our exes and recall the happier times. However based on what you have mentioned, the relationship is not healthy so you have made the right decision. Just believe that you are an amazing, smart and loveable girl. You have your life ahead of you and you will find someone who not only loves but also respects you. They say things fall apart for better things to take their place. But you need to be ready to let go to make space for new people and experiences. You are strong. Don't ever doubt your strength.
- Meghna Prabhu