I am 26 year old boy, currently living in Delhi. I'm in a relationship since last 5 years and 2 years back we got committed to each other but now things have been changing between the two of us. I'm not settled and she is also not settled in her life. Should we take a break or think before doing this.
I just want to clear one thing that we are happy together but due to busy schedules we don't give enough time to each other. But we both are committed so we know that such things happen in relationships, but for how long? We both are getting irritated with this behavior for each other. I’m just confused with word "Commitment" that pinches me. Does this word mean that I have to marry to that ‘committed’ someone?
Expert Advice –
As you are just around 26 years old, I am guessing, so would be your girlfriend. Both of you have ample time of settle down in your life. Shaping one’s career can be hard , frustrating , but after all this hard work and hurdles and struggles ,a shining future awaits the two of you, so I would suggest that you don't surrender your zeal and zest for life, both of you are lucky that you have had such a long and a good relationship .
You at least have someone in your life to share all your worries, frustrations and each other's support to get through the daily grind of life. A good relationship is like a medicine which makes life interesting energetic, pleasant, and lends emotional stability and support. There may be times where both of you are bored of each other & your relationship may even look stale.
My suggestions to you is that at such times try to give some space to each other , if possible go out with each other’s common friends. Bring some changes in your wardrobe, hair style. Getting irritated of each other shows that both of you are losing interest in what you have, If this is so, talk to each other on every aspects of your relationship including the marriage part, most important is to honestly evaluate whether being in this relationship gives you happiness and whether you look forward to each other's company and miss each other at times.
Commitment is a form of devotion. Loyalty and faithfulness is not a burden or pressure and liability. If anyone feels like this then the relationship cannot survive. First of all you make up your mind and ask yourself whether you are ready for marriage or not. It could be that your nervousness is behind all these confusions. If this is so, then I am again requesting you to please talk to each other on every aspects of your relationship including the part about marriage. The most important thing is to decide whether both of you still want to continue this relationship or not.
Good luck and Take Care
- Pratibha Singh